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Chatman Counselingand Rehabilitation
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My Teen Has Been Referred for Problematic Sexual Behavior. Now What?

The first days after a referral can feel chaotic. A clear order of steps makes them easier to manage.

Request a Free Consultation or call (405) 205-6314

Start by slowing down. Your first jobs are to learn exactly what the referral asks for, keep your home as calm as you can and book a free consultation so you can ask questions before anything is decided. You do not need every answer this week. You need the next step, and this page lays the steps out in order, along with what to say to your teen, what to avoid and who to call.

In Order

Your Next Steps, in Order

  1. Pause Before Reacting

    Give yourself time before a big conversation with your teen. A calm first talk is easier to build on than an angry one.

  2. Read the Referral Closely

    Note who made the referral, what it asks for and any dates it names. Write down whatever is unclear.

  3. Call the Referral Source

    Ask what is required, which dates matter and which providers they accept.

  4. Book a Free Consultation

    The consultation lasts 20 to 30 minutes and costs nothing. Explain what happened in general terms, then ask what the work would look like for your teen.

  5. Schedule the Assessment

    If you decide to go ahead, a 1 to 2 hour assessment reviews your teen's history and concerns and produces an individualized plan.

What to Say to Your Teen

Your teen needs to hear two things: this is serious, and you are still their parent. Short, steady words are enough:

  • "This is serious, and we are going to deal with it together."
  • "I'm upset about what happened. I still love you."
  • "You don't have to explain everything to me tonight."
  • "Right now my job is to keep you safe and get you the right help."
  • "I'll tell you what I know about what happens next, and I'll be honest when I don't know."

What Not to Say or Do

  • Labels that turn the behavior into an identity. Talk about what your teen did, not about what they are.
  • Interrogating your teen for every detail. Leave detailed questions to the professionals involved and to the assessment.
  • Promises about how this will turn out, such as saying the referral will simply go away.
  • Threats made in the heat of the moment. Decide on household rules once you are calm.
  • Talking about the referral with relatives, friends or on social media before you understand what you are facing.
  • Putting details in a first voicemail or email to the office. Neither is secure, so leave only your name, a way to reach you and a general reason.

Who to Call First

Start with the referral source: the caseworker, probation officer, court program or community organization that made the referral. They can tell you what is required and which providers they accept. Acceptance is their decision alone, and no provider can promise it on their behalf.

Then call the practice at (405) 205-6314, or use the Contact page, to request the free consultation. If your family has legal questions, take them to the professionals handling the case; the practice provides counseling, not legal advice.

If your teen or anyone at home is in crisis, call or text 988, and call 911 if someone is in immediate danger. The office is not an emergency service.

OJA (Office of Juvenile Affairs) approved in Oklahoma for problematic sexual behavior and anger management. Court-approved therapist for problematic sexual offense treatment.

Early Questions From Parents

Does the referral mean treatment has already started?

Not yet. Treatment begins after the consultation and the assessment, once a plan is set around your teen's needs and any program requirements.

Can I call on my teen's behalf?

Yes. A parent or guardian can call to ask questions and request the consultation, since families are part of how the practice works with young people.

What if we don't live near Oklahoma City?

Families anywhere in Oklahoma can use telehealth, so distance does not have to hold up the first step. In-person sessions take place at the office on South Western Avenue.

How much will treatment cost?

For rates and the insurance plans the practice accepts, see the Rates and Insurance page. Benefits differ from plan to plan, and the office can confirm yours.

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Ask Your Questions First

A free 20 to 30 minute consultation gives you room to explain the situation briefly and hear what treatment involves, with no commitment.

Free 20 to 30 minute consultation. Monday through Friday, by appointment.

Request a Free Consultation Call (405) 205-6314
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